Archive for August, 2008


August 24, 2008

This is me tring to pull myself together sincei  still have mental health to revise.

To be gained from passing law…

  1. Well i get to go back to school in 3 weeks.
  2. I can buy a shiny new laptop with my disabled students allowance (im dyslexic and add don’t you know) I want this one…..

  1. I can get a new tattoo which i think might cheer me up. I think I might like a bee for many reasons. I like this one quite alot…
  2. I’d be super busy again and not have time to be so depressed.
  3. I get to go and work at the refugee place which i keep forgetting to be excited about since i demmanded it!!
  4. And, well i’d be a bit closer to being a social worker…

Have you ever….

August 24, 2008

Had that terrible feeling that everything is coming to its inevitable end?

Handed in my social problems paper on friday with wobbly hands. Law on tuesday. Results two firdays later. Black hole.

And now for something completely different.

August 19, 2008

I’ve been on an outing today. All the way up to North Hill to see the lovely indian dentist. My actual dentist i reckon is sri lankan because he is miniscule and prstine looking with beautiful eyes. He does have a habit of calling me ‘darlink’ much like my Dad’s girlfriend but he’s very good. Meanwhile he is on holiday until the end of september – seems a fair exchange to me – excellent dental treatment provided on the NHS to the citizens of Plymouth in exchange for enough pennnies and time off for an extended trip home to see the folks. But i’m just speculating.

In the taxi on the way, my hungarian driver told me it had become the law that you could knife your dentist to death and also that his dentist had once kneed him in the chest whilst removing a tooth and he had then threatened the dentist’s life in the street. Taxi driver looked about 20 to me and it was all a bit League of Gentleman.

In the waiting room for aforementioned nice indian dentist lady i did some good people watching. Immediatley an enourmously fat girl exited the treatment room and bellowed to her weedy looking boyfriend that ‘i aint allowed to eat NUFFINK, like for tha res of tha day OR ANYFINK!!!’

Luckily I was hiding behind Case Histories or there may have been a very visble smirk.

I’ll stay beside you and comfort your soul, when you are lonely and broken and old.

August 17, 2008

I think the concept of time being able to heal is a bit of a fallacy. What it infact sometimes does is just patch things up a bit much like wallpaper over cracked plaster.

I had the mother to visit this afternoon. We had a nice lunch at Bacarro and a glass of wine because now I am 29 years old she can just about handle me drinking in front of her. Sadly this precipitated her bursting into tears on the hoe because apparently Walthamstow dog track has closed and the nice charity people predict a plethora of homeless greyhounds in London and the surrounding area and perhaps we should goand fetch one but that would be silly wouldn’t it? No, I don’t think so. I think thats a great idea and I tried to talk her into it to no avail.

This outburst segued directly into ‘i look at the lonely hearts in the paper you know’….’but then i think no one could ever replace George so theres no point really is there?’ And also ‘well what would a 68 year old man want with a woman? (companionship??) – someone to cook his meals i don’t doubt!!’.

Furthermore ‘well anyway you have to text something to somewhere and i don’t know how to do it anyway so i couldn’t reply anyway’

So i said ‘shall we look at them together next time i come home and i’ll see what you have to do?’

‘yes alright then’ ( a bit more brightly)

I’m not quite sure really whether the answer is a dog or a date or none of the above but after mum went home i sat down and cried and cried.

It was fine at the time, there was no way of knowing…

August 12, 2008

Actuaqlly that title is a bit depressing but i’m missing my Roxy Music cd so ‘More than this’ is stuck in my head.

My law exam is 2 weeks today. Revision is at least happening. Social Problems due next Friday. I am lagging a bit on this. It is 4000 words of analysis of divorce and separation with secondary themes of partner abuse and lone parenting threaded in. It is a bit all over the place at the moment and well – its maqkes me feel sad.

Meanwhile the vegetation at Chez Shep has increased alot lately. We have now big spikey plants on the terrace and i now have basil, flat leaf parsley and chives in the kitchen busily growing away. These make me happy. I might even have a bash at drying some parsley in the oven later since its growing out of control already. What i really want is a little olive tree like i saw at Eden Project and a tomato plant since the flat is like a greenhouse anyway but Shep is a bit reluctant to aquire more plant clutter.

Playscheme has been continually joyeous as always except i dont approve of parents givng their offspring daft sounding double barrelled first names and insisting they use them at all times. Especially when they are only 5! Don’t make it more difficult than it already is for your 5 year old to introduce themself to other 5 year olds!!! Rant over

Meanwhile i discovered this morning that Shep and I own 6 bottles of baby powder between us. Thats just not normal is it?

Talk amongst yourselves, i may be some time

August 7, 2008

This is another mish mash post. Feeling a bit vague and meloncholy just now and i need to snap out of it. In the meantime…

  • I need to sell my beloved emac. I think i will put it on ebay but any advice on selling pooter equipment gratefully received.
  • I could do with selling a ton of other stuff since i am v poor atm until end of aug/sept loan period.
  • Shep has started his diving jobs and is v happy.
  • SGT’s art retreat for ages 4 – 12 is up and running and working out fabulously. I should really take photos. The weenies i look after at work really do save my soul and i think id be a good deal more depressed without their sunshine and innocence and humility.
  • My friend brought in her new baby to work yesterday. I was absurdly broody afterwards and am still desperate for a boy for some reason.
  • I am really fucked off with two of my friends. Neither of whom read this blog. I really want to say ‘if you are phoning up because you want help with something JUST FUCK OFF’ I have my limits, i tell you what to do, you ignore me and then expect me to mop up tears when things go tits up. Grrr.


August 6, 2008

I haven’t posted for a while so heres a news round up….

  • Shep is back home from Scotland. I flew up to Newcastle to meet him and spend the weekend with friends there. It was heaps fun and I got to see the Angel of the North finally. (dont wanna here anyone saying its crap please i loved it).
  • I’m even more amazed about this now since all the rain but we squeezed in a beach day last monday at Challeborough. Look on facebook for pics of shep and a pink bucket and spade. i’ve swan in the sea and made my sandcastle so summer has happened as far as i’m concerened!
  • I’ve gone back to work with the weenies for the summer. Rain is trapping them indoors but we’ve done lots of crafty type stuff including challenging the little boys to make a dolls house and the girls to build an army camp both out of cardboard boxes etc. Naturally the girls thrashed the boys much to Sheps chagrin.
  • We’ve had birthday number two of the summer in our house. Somebody was pleased with all his presents. Especially the Blackadder boxed set.
  • We went to Bournemouth at the weekend to see my bestest friend and drowned on the beach there.
  • Have three weeks until my law exam and 2.5 til i have to submit my social problems papers. Feel a bit anxious about both really.