And now for something completely different.

I’ve been on an outing today. All the way up to North Hill to see the lovely indian dentist. My actual dentist i reckon is sri lankan because he is miniscule and prstine looking with beautiful eyes. He does have a habit of calling me ‘darlink’ much like my Dad’s girlfriend but he’s very good. Meanwhile he is on holiday until the end of september – seems a fair exchange to me – excellent dental treatment provided on the NHS to the citizens of Plymouth in exchange for enough pennnies and time off for an extended trip home to see the folks. But i’m just speculating.

In the taxi on the way, my hungarian driver told me it had become the law that you could knife your dentist to death and also that his dentist had once kneed him in the chest whilst removing a tooth and he had then threatened the dentist’s life in the street. Taxi driver looked about 20 to me and it was all a bit League of Gentleman.

In the waiting room for aforementioned nice indian dentist lady i did some good people watching. Immediatley an enourmously fat girl exited the treatment room and bellowed to her weedy looking boyfriend that ‘i aint allowed to eat NUFFINK, like for tha res of tha day OR ANYFINK!!!’

Luckily I was hiding behind Case Histories or there may have been a very visble smirk.

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5 Responses to “And now for something completely different.”

  1. Matt Says:

    The joy’s of Plymouth.

  2. blue soup Says:

    I wish I had a lovely dentist. I rarely go because I am so scared of them!!

    When I was a kid, I had a dentist who had to give me an injection. Thinking he was funny, he pulled out a massive syringe and a long needle and waved it at me as Ilay on the chair. He laughed and said “only joking” and then got a smaller one but I did my nut. My Mum was cross with him and we changed practices after that. I was only about 7, what kind of moron does that to a small child???

    Anyway, my fears of dentists and of needles were born.

    A few years later, I was in A&E for something (I forget now) and I needed an injection. Along came a student doctor who needed to do some paediatrics. He got his little needle out and I tried to stay calm, but as he came near me, I lashed out and kicked him in the chest.

    I still blame the dentist.

  3. sungirltan Says:

    matt – gotta love Taxifast.

    bs- gods thats awful – i hate dentists but because the swedish ones tortured me in 05. i didnt have even a filling until then so i had no ingrained phobia.

  4. Gorilla Bananas Says:

    I had a great dentist when I was in the circus. Actually he was a vet, but that didn’t stop him knowing his way around my mouth. He never did anything that hurt – he was just too scared of me!

  5. cha0tic Says:

    I read ‘Marathon Man’ at an early age.

    It’s never safe.

    …I hate Dentists.

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