Archive for May 4th, 2009

Clucking Bell

May 4, 2009

Ok so I have graduated the whinging about looking fat and not pregnant phase but this has just given way to the ‘i have nothing to wear!!!’ phase. Well its true.

I ventured out to buy bump friendly apparel quite a while ago now with posh friend who was visitng. I tried some jeans on in H&M Mamma with the nice stretchy bump cover, concluded they were quite reasonable and bought them, thinking i’d just repeat process out of necessity in the future.

OH NO!!!! This event was some kind of nasty fluke designed to trick me. Nice, narrow leg maternity jeans in H&M are now nowhere to be seen in the shop and they seem to now only cater for mummies who are sizes 18 and 20.

I have now been in every shop in Plymouth to peruse maternity items and come back with nothing. They either don’t stock or stock hideous. I even went in Dorothy Perkins but their wares included trousers with tapered ankles just like the kind my mother and her friends (who are all 60 plus) favour and I was frightened!

I have been all over the internet today looking for jeans. Top half garments are less of a problem. I got lots of things I like from asos.com who do maternity (yes, I was frankly amazed too!). Its just bottom halves. I have got a collection of linen/jersey/leggings type bottoms which are very nice but its either too cold to wear them much yet or they require tiny underwear which right now I just don’t have the patience for (or any which fits me).

What I want are straight leg or skinny jeans with over bump waists. I do not want bootcut (its not the 90’s!!) or baggy, boyfriend styles. (The bootcut ones piss me off more than anything – I wouldn’t wear them normally, why do I have to let myself down because I’m pregnant? I don’t wear navy or shop at GAP ok?)

I have another 2.5 months of work to get through before I can start slouching around wearing Shep’s clothes. My agency has a dress code because we work with alot of muslim families which involves a lot of covering up and sensible attire (actually I support this and its made me feel less vulnerable on many occasions). The way I manage this is by wearing jeans and big boots and swapping low necklines for brighter colours and more flamboyant accessories. So I need some good jeans!

Furthermore there seems to be some random politics about the waists on maternity jeans. If you are a mumsy, middle of the road shop you must sell lots of over bump waists with hideous old people jeans attached to them. If you are a young persons, trendy type shop you must only sell the under bump, horrible itchy looking wooly panel type maternity jeans. Unless you are H&M, in which case you must sell the desirable to SGT jeans but never have any in stock. That seems to be the law.

Magazines for pregnant ladies (I was surprised how much I liked some of these – more to them than womens glossies and at no point did they bang on about drinking more water or unrealistic diets) seems to be pushing this Isabelle Oliver brand of maternity gear – yes, its gorgeous but I’m not spending £110 on one pair of jeans I might wear for 3 more months, poke it.

I am now going to order a truckload of stuff from La Redoute and hope for the best.