Um, well ok. Since I last blogged with any regularity, you know, stuff has happened so here’s my bridge back πŸ™‚

These are some things which happened since May last year.

Driving. Farking hell learning to drive was hard. I passed my test 3 days ago though πŸ™‚ I inherited my driving instructor from my most neurotic friend so I had high hopes. Jim* was an ex marine from Leeds who has a catchphrase for everything and chattered constantly about Audrey*, ‘the wife’ (he was actually saying that! not on a sit com!!) and to his credit, didn’t lose his rag with me when I freaked out for the millionth time abotu scary lane changes. I am now driving on my own (watch out) and its going just about ok. Excpet this afternoon when I thought I’d trapped myself in a parking space so badly I thought I would have to go back inside the Devonshire and ask them to do a tannoy for me and make the owner of the car next to me move to let me out. I might have just died of shame if it had ocme to this 😦

Nursery. Small goes to a montessori two days a week now. Obviously I am supposed to at work whilst she is there but I’m not quite yet so in the meantime I finally have some time off from being a Mum. Before you judge me, my husband works away most of the time, I don’t get a break at weekends like most parents. I haven’t really had a break for a long time. Last time Small was poolry we stayed in the house for a week. 1 because I got it too and 2 because all of the lovely people who offered to help also have babies and I felt too guilty. Friday was my very first real break day when I drove Small to nursery and then had what seemed like one million hours to myself. I have been bouncing off the walls with joy since then!

Friends. Mmm friends yes. Massive cliche I know but having a baby fucks with your social life big style. Actually having a baby and graduationg fucks with your social life. In hindsight what happens is that big lifestyle changes act like a big old filter and do you a favour in the long run. Before this gets a bit crap and cryptic, my (perceived) bestest uni friends are no longer BUT I made lots of friends through having a baby who are amazing. The irony was that I looked everywhere for clever, cultured, self assured women who lean toward the tree hugging hippy lifestyle choice. And then I had Z and they just kept on turning up at the same baby classes. So as well as me having 5 new friends who I see twice a week, Small has 5 little friends to share her life with.

Job. I don’t have a job quite yet. My 12 month goal went out the window when driving terror fell in! I have an application deadline of February 5th and a heap of agency leads, well two. My hope is now to get back to work before easter. I have a social worker social do on Friday. I expect the shop talk to be depressing. There are lots of jobs but no money to do anything. I think the Riven Vincent case may be very topical.

House. We are atrempting to upgrade from Shep Towers. Wanky bachelor pad + truck loads of baby junk/diving kit/imaginary 2nd baby = chaos and arguments. When we have sold Shep Towers we have to enter the world of scary school catchment area issues. Yes, I have become someone else. Luckily I have mumsnet for this alter ego πŸ™‚

Self. Well after nearly 16 months my size 8 jeans are too big he he. I know that makes me osund like a wanker but I NEVER thought I’d be me again, ever. Only thing for it is to walk everywhere shoving heavy pram, lots of gym ball crunches and a few gallons of Bio Oil. Yeh yeh. I had a baby and now I’m thin again. Dull isn’t it? I shall say no more πŸ˜‰

And now its time to write proper posts, present tense like πŸ™‚

One Response to “Retrospectacle”

  1. Brennig Says:

    That was easy peasy, wasn’t it!

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